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artist profile

Exploring the phrase ‘You look how I feel’ encompasses my approach to viewing and making art.
My emotions are changeable, reflected in the materials and themes of my mixed my media creations.
Sometimes I feel bleak, consumed by an empty silence that inhibits and undermines me. I could sell my excess state if it were in high demand. Whilst I move towards more positive and productive emotions I make objects that echo this tortured, painful and self-indulgent gloom. Often I simply want to make appealing and entertaining images that feed a sabbatical bound sense of humour. I continuously hope I am moving away from ideas that serve only as autobiographical footnotes, towards ideas that have a wider appeal, hoping to understand and be understood.
Drawing dominates my practice but sculptures, print and collages continue to weave in and out. I explore other forms but they rarely give me instant or speedy rewards. I wonder why the first graphite and ink marks put down did not remain the work throughout.
I am rarely satisfied with any final results because energy gets lost between sketch and exhibition. My mind thinks far too quickly, perhaps I edit out the wrong information whilst trying to document every detail.
I know now that it is the act of creativity that gives me the most pleasure and the chance to enter a reflective state. Recently I have shied away from the discussing my imagery, preferring to observe others instead of engaging in the showmanship it might create.
My creative output helps me to process our human environment that doesn’t quite agree with me. I worry that this urge will run out if I neglect it. I panic that the chaos in my head will take hold. The value of concepts hold high value for me but I feel as though I have barely mastered or acquired the skills I need to bring my ideas to life. A persistent sense of doubt dominates everything I do. Despite the pessimism this fuels it is a healthy state which will stop my ideas from stagnating, maintaining momentum even if it dwindles due to other commitments and the various directions my life sucks me into. I have a sense that if I ever get there, to a state of satisfaction, it will be time to stop.
A main aim is to realise that I can’t do everything I would like to on my own. I want to learn how to collaborate more effectively and take on board the skills and success of my friends and contemporaries. I spend too much time thinking and not enough time reading or with a pen in hand.
Newspapers, hand written notes and narrative influence my illustrative world and noise from an ever-churning radio accompany me.
I am never more content than when I am left alone with endless hours to make whatever it is I feel compelled to do, whilst the tide rises and the seagulls scream for me outside my window.